Thursday, September 08, 2005

Mariotti Still Sucks

So, let's review real quick: the White Sox have won seven in a row and are on the verge of wrapping up the AL Central, right?

Well then, it seems like the perfect time for moronic dumbfuck Jay Mariotti to write yet another one of his pointless, cluess Sox "columns".

Today, Mariotti yet again brings up the issue of Sox attendance. I mean, God forbid he actually write a column about the Sox without going all negative and accusatory. I'm surprised he didn't have cheap criticam of Hawk Harrelson to offer.

We get it, Jay. The Sox aren't the biggest drawing team in Chicago. Are you happy now? We all understand. We all get it. Nobody is in denial. Nobody is arguing the numbers. If the Cubs are a billboatd hit, then the Sox are an underground find. (Critically acclaimed, though.)

But Mariotti just can't let it go. He needs to get his Sox digs in. It's what he does.

The asshole then continues with his drivel to take on, yes, the all-important subject of Paul Konerko's offseason plans. He even goes so far as to bring uo the image of Konerko possibly wearing a Red Sox uniform.

ARE YOU FUCKIN' SERIOUS? YOU GOTTA BE SHITTIN' ME!

How does Mariotti keep his job? Seriously? Does he have any clue whatsoever? Shit, the Sox continue to do good things, continue to be a feel-good story, continue to defy the odds, and fat fuck Mariotti is bitching about attendance (again!) and alluding to Konerko leaving in the offseason.

Yeah, because Konerko's offseason situation is what really needs to be brought up now.

Mariotti is a fat, clueless, mean-spirited, lousy fucker and the Unknown Column sincerely hopes that he realizes that very few people in this city of Chicago actually care about his reactionary, fence-jumping drivel.

Of course, Mariotti is the same dickbag who wrote last week about the Sox "choking". For the record, the word "choke" was actually IN THE TITLE!

Now, a week and seven wins later, Mariotti tries writing a feel-good piece about Konerko? Give me a fuckin' break.

I'm guessing Konerko is about the only name on the White Sox Mariotti knows, so he went with it now that the Sox are hot. Terrible, shoddy journalism.

Hey, Mariotti, get lost, asshole. Stay off the bandwagon and go stuff your face with a doughnut. By the way, your attempts at humor on that crappy ESPN show (I do my best to avoid) are beyond pathetic. Woody Paige is funny. You're not. You're fat. And decidedly unfunny. So don't even try.

Sorry, Jay. The tuth hurts. You suck. And you might want to wax those eyebrows again. They're coming back.

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